Is that a real word or did you just make it up?

How many times have you guffawed - out loud or smothered behind a cough - at someone's verbal gaffe? In particular, when they use a word that you know doesn't exist. Do you experience a moment of amused superiority or, at the very least, save it up to share with friends afterwards? But why do we laugh or sneer at people who unintentionally utter new words? After all, isn't our language built on the creativity of fearless word-building folk?


Our English medieval ancestors spoke a language that was already a bit of a hotchpotch thanks to various invading tribes in the preceding centuries. Then Shakespeare came along and, seeing a need, merrily invented words to suit. He added prefixes and suffixes to existing words, was an early adopter of verbing nouns, copied the Germans by running two words together to make a new one, and dreamed up totally new and different creations. A hundred or so years later pseudo-Latin words were all the rage because people thought it made them look clever. In the 1800s some smart young things thought it was amusing to invent new words such as discombobulate, presumably so that you could discombobulate those who weren't in the know.

So, if English is made up of so many made-up words why are we so quick to laugh at people who use made up words unintentionally? Some made up words are really quite useful. For instance, when a little boy in a swim class couldn't swim along the bottom of the pool, try as he might, his teacher said, 'He's really quite floatacious'. How apt. The boy was not keen to dive either and his teacher decided not to push him too far in case he decided to rebaliate. I know what she means! Once he rebaliates it's all over, believe me! At a local club a committee member thought an unhealthy tree would need to be seen by an arbitrist. Sounds like the right person to make a decision about trees.

When did I first hear of comfortability? I'm not sure, but for me it comes under the heading of 'ugly but out there' words. It's not recognised by any major dictionaries but it's definitely out there on Google. These are the words that are based on something familiar but you can't believe they are for real. In fifty years, the progress of English being what it is, I expect to experience total comfortability with these types of words. In the meantime, I'll leave that one for you to use.

Some words have caught me out. I still cannot come to terms with impactful. I read it for the first time only a few months ago and was all ready to get superior but thought I had better look it up first. It turns out that impactful has been around since the 1950s and has made it into reputable dictionaries. Who knew? Not me. Kanye West did, though. He said 'I am the Number One most impactful artist of our generation.' If you say so, Kanye.

And sometimes it's an education. In a sound bite I heard on the radio, John Kerry, the US Secretary of State, referred to occupated land in Aleppo. What a clanger, right? Er, wrong. Those of you who knew the word already can laugh at me now. 

So when you hear someone utter a word you think is made up, look it up before you snortle. There are more words out there than you can ever know and, after all, our language is built on yesterday's 'ugly but out there' offerings.